She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
