I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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