eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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