Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
