I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
