i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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