Whats the glycemic index on semen?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
