I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
