hell yes lets make some ravioli
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
