If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
