he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
