bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
