I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
