what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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