Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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