Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
