did you get engaged???
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
