Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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