Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
