I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
