Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
