If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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