Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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