No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
