So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
