He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize