Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
