Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
this will be a night to untag.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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