i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
