Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
third nipple confirmed
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
