Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Ketchup is God's man juice
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
