Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Houston, we have a squirter
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Randomize
