It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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