doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
