I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
