He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
