what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
