So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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