I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize