he looks like a really good dad on facebook
My pussy is not your playground.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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