I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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