At least make sure they are 18
Why
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
