It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
It's shark week go big or go home
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
