singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
