btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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