Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
