nut hugger
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
