You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
