He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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