Tell her she can't have a vagina
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
